OH F*#K! I'M SHOT!!

Ok, so this is one of the most hilarious things I've seen in the last 18 hours.  This kid's roommate plays a prank on him by playing audio of shotgun blasts.  I don't want to say more about it and ruin the hilarity; but this reminds me of when I rigged an old manure spreader to go off when my roommate started humpin' on his dope-ified girlfriend.  ... Um... I guess it's really nothing like that, but it was crap-tastic.  Trust me.

Roommate Gun Shots Prank - Watch more free videos

MENTAL ILLNESS OF THE MONTH!

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

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This month I'm giving a shout-out to good old borderline PD.  This nifty little illness is "characterized by pervasive instability in moods, interpersonal relationships, self-image, and behavior. This instability often disrupts family and work life, long-term planning, and the individual's sense of self-identity. Originally thought to be at the "borderline" of psychosis, people with BPD suffer from a disorder of emotion regulation."  

Now I imagine some of you are thinking, 'Golly, I know someone like this...'  Well, before you go throwing a butterfly net over their head, recognize that BPD is really severe mood swings.  It'll seem like the person has different personalities.  One minute they will be friendly and/or calm and the next minute you'll find your pet rabbit boiling in a pot.  So remember boys and girls: borderline personality disorder - bad.  Caca.  Pooey.

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To learn more about this little gem of psychosis go to:

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/borderline-personality-disorder.shtml

In the weeds

Can anyone explain this craziness?

Finish the sentence:

"Darla Jean loved ropin' and rasslin' night at the club, but it usually ended with _______________________"

Hong Kong at night.

How awesome does this place look.  Makes me want to party with my pants off... if you know what I mean. {winkwink pointpoint}

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Click pic for larger view, for the love of the sweet mother Mary.

Presidential Betting Odds

I love politics.  It's like a soap opera with real life consequences at the end.  Entertaining and about as relaxing as being beaten with a sock full of oranges.  So what are the odds?  Well, as of February 20th...

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Obama .....6/5

McCain ....7/5

Clinton ...2/1

Huckabee ..500/1

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Hey, how 'bout that Huckabee huh?  I'm gonna put a buck on him because, well, you never know.  I mean, if I had a nickel for every "favorite" I bet on who ended up dragging ass at the quarter mile because some stable hand gave me a hot tip after a day of smoking weed and shoveling crapola I'd be... well... I'd be at least thirty cents richer... uh... yeah... thirty cents at least.

The 3 foolproof laws for getting in shape.

Ok, so I've been going to the gym and working out 5-7 days a week for the last 20 years.  I've seen a lot of things done right and a lot of idiotic efforts.  Here are 3 "laws" for getting into shape.  They are foolproof.

1.  Eat right.  It's a cliche and no one wants to hear about it any more.  But getting your body into good physical shape is about 85% good nutrition.  I'm not gonna get into the whole wacky food pyramid thing, but if you're working out more than 3 times/week your daily diet should roughly include: carbohydrates 5-7 grams/kg of bodyweight; protien 0.8 grams/kg of bodyweight daily; fat 1 gram/kg of bodyweight daily.

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Pound to kilogram conversion: 

http://www.onlineconversion.com/weight_common.htm

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2.  Know what you're doing.  Get a set routine tailored to the goals you want to achieve.  If you don't know how to do this, hire a trainer to get you started.  Many trainers start at $20/hour and can give you a routine and show you how to properly use the weights in 1-2 sessions.  It's more than worth it.

3. Most important --> be consistent.  Unless you have a death in the family or a major catastrophic event (eg., hurricane, mudslide, personal scandal breaking on the local news) NEVER skip a day that you plan to work out.  Go in especially when you don't feel like it.  

So that's it Buckos.  There's the great secret for getting in shape.  This is what all those info-mercial gurus selling you bands and balls and diet pills are trying to get around doing.  But unless the human DNA changes, these are the 3 things you're gonna need to get into shape.  If you stick to this routine faithfully, no matter what, you WILL get into shape - GUARANTEED.  Remember, the is no such thing as a "bad workout."