WTCCTR - THE SOUNDTRACK!

If you're a regular to this site you know I post a song (along with a luscious babe and frothy beer) every week for your listening pleasure.  Well, I made a soundtrack of these tunes and posted them on Apple's iTunes store.  So for just $12.87 you can absolutely rock your nuts off.  I mean, the first time I heard all these songs on one play list I actually pissed myself it was so good; and I haven't had a genuine case of incontinence like that since the time I ate a handful of magic mushrooms just before St. Mother Mary Katherine's 62nd annual chili cook off and midget toss.  True story.  

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So if you have iTunes on your computer and you want to check it out, go here.  Yeah.  What now Bitches?

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FRIDAY'S BABE, BEER, AND A TUNE.... ON SATURDAY... SO SCREW YOU.

Ok, funny story.  I was preparing for yesterday's post and ended up doing a little too much research.  So when I woke up in front of my neighbor's house with an empty bag of saline solution in one hand and a pinwheel in the other, I decided to cut my losses and go to bed immediately.  

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But I'm back!  And I'm posting Friday's babe, beer, and a tune because I'm good like that.  God I love you fuckers.

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Tonight's babe is Claudia Verela.  She's a full time fitness/bikini model who won't do nudes because "that isn't the road [she] wants to follow."  Uh... ok.  Yeah, I mean, who would want to see her totally naked anyway?!?  Not me buddy.  I don't need that kind of pressure.  More pics of her here.

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As I alluded to above, last night was kind of a blur but I remember it all started with a sixer of Guinness.  I always enjoy Guinness but that's because I don't mind taking in the same amount of calories as an entire loaf of bread in one glass of beer.  And any brew you drink yourself into a blackout with is a 'thumbs up' in my book.  You betcha.  Beer Advocate rates it a B+ ... "very good"... so a big 'fuck yeah' all around.  I'll do a review of the 1000cc of saline solution I apparently drank if/when I can remember drinking it.

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The tunage I'm smoking your ass with tonight is "Bitter Pill" by Silent Civilian.  They're a metal core band out of L.A.  What is metal core?  I have no f*cking idea.  All I know is that I crank up this tune so loud my balls vibrate.  

"Bitter Pill"

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Lastly. I'm trying to increase my readership.  So if you know anyone who would enjoy the quality tits, humor, and money advice that I roll into every joint I post, please email them a link to this site.  Thanks bitches.

Technorati Tags: claudia verela, babe, guiness, beer, bitter pill, silent civilian, tune, boobs, babes, beers, tits, monster turds, cash

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EXPLODING WHALES AND CEMENT TURKEYS.

I'm not a rocket scientist.  But my saving grace is that I don't have access to 1/2 ton of dynamite or a rotting whale carcass.  I guess not everyone is that lucky.  

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It kind of reminded me of another clip I'd seen when I was just a kid, around the time I'd realized that tugging on my tits with salad tongs made me feel pretty.  The scene is from the tv show "WKRP in Cincinnati." 

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Fuck yeah Les Nesman.

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POSSIBLY THE WORST THING EVER: MINI-ME SEX TAPE

I have never been a big fan of Verne Troyer.  I didn't even find him entertaining in the Austin Powers movies.  He was more like a creepy little foot note.  Now we get a taste of his sex tape.  It's only a little clip but it's probably the worst thing I've ever seen in the history of my life.  Even worse than the time I misread an ad and spent two hours in a time-share seminar with Wally Firebrand - a staunch naturalist with rabid B.O.  Ah... good times.

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Catch the horror here.

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MAKE YOUR OWN RECEIPTS!

Once upon a time I had a job where I had to submit receipts for everything: mileage, tolls, bitches.  Of course, I'd lose many of the receipts.  So I'd have to go to one of my co-workers - who used to be in the mob - and beg him to make receipts for me using some kind of illicit receipt machine he'd cobbled together.  Do you know how hard it is not to stare at the mutilated nose of an ex-mobster in order not to offend him?  Lemme tell ya Buckos, it's hard.  I mean, the dude got stabbed right in his nose in a brawl in a NYC subway.  It's hard to convince a guy like that of the importance of getting reimbursed $1.25 for thruway tolls.  

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But beg no more!  Now there's a web site that allows you to make your own receipts.  The site is Custom Receipt Maker.  And, as you can see from my sample posted above, the sky's the limit.  I mean, getting your employer to pay for your skittles and... uh... other weekend necessities...  is a nifty little perk!

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By the way, all that stuff about working with an ex-mobster who got stabbed in the nose... 100% true.  Dave, if you're reading this, I need my cooler back.

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4 POLITICALLY INCORRECT PICS AND 1 PICKLE TICKLER.

Say hey Bitches.  I was surfing around the internets looking for a Pez dispenser that will work with Viagra and came across some righteous pictures.  Four of 'em tickle my funny bone and the fifth makes my dingus tingle.

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Bad wassamelon.

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Amen.  All clowns must fucking die.

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Yeah, I'm going to hell... but I'll be giggling.

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We've all been there.

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I think this is an ad for underwear, which makes

sense because I just ruined the pair I'm wearing.

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FRIDAY'S BABE, BEER, AND A TUNE.

Hey Hey... first babe, beer, and a tune in a few weeks.  And I'm back with a bang baby.  

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KAPOW!  The babe is Erin Ellington.  She's basically a fitness model.  Oh she's fit.  She's fit.  Very.. uh.. fit.  Shit has me mumbling to myself.  More pics of her here.

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I'm not a great golfer but I am a great beer drinker.  And coolers fit perfectly on the back of those gay-ish golf carts.  So last week I was following one of those little white balls around and drinking on some icy cold Heineken lights.  Two words: delicious.  Well, that's only one word but they were really tasty.  Unfortunately, beer advocate rates Heiny lights as D+ ... "avoid."  Huh.

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Tune tonight is "So Sorry To Say" by Celldweller.  Even though these guys look like they're from Venus, they're really a Detroit band.  And this song isn't "sorry" at all.  It's actually pretty awesome.

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"So Sorry To Say"

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Work the weekend Buckos!  And stay strong... strong like bull you crazy bastards.

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