WEEKEND'S HERE BITCHES.....WHOOOOOOHEEEAAARRRGGGHHH.

Whew.  Made it through another one.  And weekends mean free time to rest, regroup, catch up on odds and ends, spend time with family... oh, and party like the sadistic warden in charge of the naughty nymphomaniac Miss Hawaiian Tropic bikini prison.  So today I thought I'd give everyone a special treat; and pull back the curtain on my highly classified preparatory routine that makes me an international assassin of love.  Stay strong.

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GEORGE BRETT SHIT HIS PANTS.

All this week I'm focusing on strategies to help us deal with the cratering economic disaster.  Monday was cleavage.  Yesterday was tips on how to stay calm.  Tonight's strategy is this: count your blessings.  Instead of thinking about how you'll now have to work until age 78 before you can retire, try and concentrate on the things you're blessed with.  Take, for example... oh... I don't know... um... well, like not having a huge "double tapered" shit nesting in your grape smuggler (ie., underwear), like George Brett.  Honestly, I don't even know what the hell a "double tapered shit" is but it sounds like good old George has some major league fecal issues on his hands - literally.  Stay strong... and continent.

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