FRIDAY'S BABE, BEER, AND A TUNE.

Uhh... hi.  I've been temporarily thawed from my cryostasis that is the Northeastern winter to bring you BB&T.  It's been awhile.  Strap on... or in... you know what I mean.

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The babe tonight is Jamie Eason.  She's the recommendation of a friend who says I need more blondes on this site.  So here she is. Jamie is from Houston, Texas and is a fitness model and ex-dancer.  Plus, she works out like a motherf*cker.  I haven't seen an arm like that since my first match at the Arm Wrasslin' and Watermelon Seed Spittin' contest at Billy Bob's House of Your Mother. Her vagina must feel like a bear trap.  But I'm a courageous man of principal; and I'll test the waters if I need to.  I know.  I know... you're welcome.  More pics of her here.

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The beer tonight isn't a beer at all, but hot mulled cider with cinnamon and spiced rum.  It's currently -9 degrees here in New York so I'm skipping the beer tonight and going with something warm.  I love beer like Whitney Houston loved Bobby Brown's crazy cracked-out ass but I can't do it tonight.  I've been making this for about Apthe last ten winters and it's goddam delicious, so deal with it.  Besides, if it hit's -10 degrees I'm planning to actually set myself on fire.  Beer takes a back seat when self-immolation is involved.

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The band tonight is Ra - and they fucking rock.  They're from Connecticut and haven't put out a bad song ever.  They have a catalogue of about 50 songs and every single one of them is good.  They could write a song about strap-ons and dead kittens and it would still be good.  I'm telling you.  They're better than a George Foreman Grill.  The song I'm featuring is "Only."  Plus, it's live.  What does that mean for you, the WTCCTR consumer?  More tasty tunage for to suck on.  You're right, I am pretty cool.  Stay strong.

"Only"

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PRANK CALLERS ARE AWESOME.

We've all seen and/or heard those prank phone calls on talk shows.  They usually get hung up on pretty quickly.  Wouldn't it be funny if they couldn't hang up on them?  Ummm... yeah, it would.  I have proof.

Religious TV Host Badly Pranked - Watch more Free Videos

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2009 - HARDER BETTER FASTER STRONGER

Well, here at WTCCTR 2008 was ushered out with a nifty little musical interlude so I thought we'd welcome 2009 in that same manner.  All this interest in music probably has something to do with the 47 ecstasy tablets I took on or around December 30th... I'm not sure of the exact date.   Anyway, here's a ball pumping tune by Daft Punk.  I suggest you watch it in HD (a new option with some YouTube videos).  May your new year be harder, better, faster, and stronger than the last.  Oh, and my New Year's Resolution?  Stop storing my ecstasy in the ibuprofen bottle.  Stay strong.

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TIME FOR SOME PINK FLOYD

Pink Floyd is awesome.  There are a few bands that hover above of the rest of the rabble of banks plucking their instruments and clutching onto their dorks: AC/DC, Rush, Aerosmith, Sweet Jimmy DiFranco and the DiFranco Five... and definitely Roger Waters and crew.  So I thought we'd go with a musical interlude tonight: Pink Floyd's "Run Like Hell" - in concert.  Roll your doobs now... and toke up on the awesomeness.  Stay strong.

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PHILIPPINES, HERE I COME

I love America but American tv sucks my ass.  Two And A Half Men, Reba, Smallville, The Office... they all smoke my wonky trouser sausage.  I haven't watched a fictional tv show from start to finish since goddam Barnaby Jones, starring goddam Buddy Ebsen.  But it seems that tv producers in the Philippines have their shit together.  Weng Weng is a Filipino actor who did movies and tv in the 70's, 80's, and 90's.  After you watch this video tribute to him you'll have to redefine your definition of entertainment.  And Charlie Sheen and Reba MacIntyre will look like the talentless hacks they really are.

Technorati Tags: babe, beer, tune, two and a half men, weng weng, reba, barnaby jones, buddy ebsen, smallville, the office, poop magic

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FRIDAY'S ... uh... SATURDAY'S BABE, BEER, AND A TUNE.

I was watching the movie "Old School" tonight and it got me kicking down memory lane to my college days.  So tonight's theme for babe, beer, and a tune is college - and all the joy of years of sustained disillusionment that followed.

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Elisha Cuthbert is our babe this week.  She starred in "Old School" and resembles absolutely not one girl I ever saw in college.  Granted, I went to a small technical college where the majority of students were Iranian or Saudi Arabian before it was cool to be Iranian or Saudi; but, shit-sodas, you'd think there'd be at least one hot chick in the school... you'd think that but you'd be wrong.  Anyway, more pictures of her white little ass here.

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Unlike Ms. Cuthbert, this is one little beauty I had a lot of run-ins with at school.  I remember buying a sixer of Piels once where all the label ink was smeared so you couldn't even read the name.  I couldn't help but think that this was some quality-assed shit I was drinking.  Bottom line: Piels isn't a good beer.  But it's cheap.  And if you can choke down the first three then the rest aren't that bad.  It's not glamorous but it gets you where you need to go.  Kind of like the bus.  Beer Advocate rates Piels a C- ... "not worthy."  In Piels defense, if BA had a ranking for "foul odor" Piels would've rated a lot higher.

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You know how they torture prisoners by blasting music they hate at them 24 hours a day?  Well, that's the origin of tonight's tune: "American Pie" by Don McLean.  The mother-f*cker across the hall from me in the dorms played this goddam song 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for my entire freshman year.  Over and over and over.  He never ever got sick of it.  In the meantime, I'm sitting about 5 feet away (in the room directly across the hall) trying to get through the worst year of my life - and having to endure this song, which I hated even before all this.  So, in keeping with tonight's college theme, here it is.  Yup.  American Pie.  By Don McLean.  I've found that it's extra enjoyable if you run a hot bath, slit the old wrists, and bleed out as this sublime melody ushers in the sweet sting of death.  Stay strong.

Discover Don McLean!

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