Friday, June 19, 2009

REZNOR, ARROWS, AND THIGH-HIGHS


I recently watched a Nine Inch Nails concert on tv and forgot how goddam awesome they are. I mean, Reznor really is a freaking genius. So I'm posting one of their videos tonight to remind everyone. This song in particular - "Hurt" - makes me want to chew tinfoil and shoot bottle rockets out of my ass. Not really sure why but it seems appropriate in this case. Oh, and just for good measure, I'm throwing in a video of a shitty William Tell impression; and a nice young woman who was apparently getting dressed for work when she got interrupted for photos. Stay sucka free.







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Wednesday, June 17, 2009

THIS IS THE GREATIST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE.

I don't know what else to say about this. It really is the greatest thing I've ever seen. Well, there was that time my buddy Dave dropped acid and thought he was Jesus Christ. That was pretty great too but he didn't fart at all... so it automatically gets bumped to #2. This video is now officially #1. My favorite "moment" occurs at about 1m50s. Play on Player.



Uhhh... encore anyone?



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Monday, June 15, 2009

110MPG V8 WITH 500HP. NOW WHAT ARABS?

How would you like to put an V8 engine in your car that goes 0-60mph in 3 seconds and gets 110 miles per gallon? Too good to be true? Nope. Some fat guy in Ohio has made an engine that does just that. He's getting patents and is starting to fire up production on an engine that will make Canada, Mexico, and Venezuela - along with the Saudis - scrambling for cash to meet their jumping bean and camel chow addictions. *We get most of our oil from Canada... didn't know that did ya?* The guy has his own web page with a bunch of videos introducing his technology. Check it out here. But the video below basically sums it up pretty good. By the way, if you work for GM, drop a dime on this guy for chrissakes.




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Sunday, June 14, 2009

TIME FOR TEA AND SCRUMPETS.

I thought I'd slow down some of this craziness tonight and offer some goddam sophistication to all you raging maniacs out there in the WTCCTR Army. That's right. You heard me. So put down the Little Debbie Snack Cake, pull your pants up, and 86 your booger rolling because you're about to get your culture on in the form of a little violin concerto. Electric violin to be exact. Oh, and the dude is playing a Black Sabbath tune. ... hey, I didn't say this was Masterpiece Theater or anything... so don't start drinking with your pinky up all of a sudden, like some kind of fancy gentleman. Fruit cake.



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Thursday, June 11, 2009

SKYNET IS COMING... TO STICK IT IN YOUR ASS


The video I'm featuring below has been bouncing around the Internet for a few years now; so you've probably seen it.  But I'm posting it tonight for two reasons.  One: the background music is catchy as f*ck.  It's called "Right Here, Right Now" by Fat Boy Slim.  I put it on a loop on my iPod and went running last week... long story short, I ran 47 miles.  The second reason for the video: Sky-Net.  Yup.  That little tidbit about laptop computers being smarter than the entire human race in 2049 - that little nugget of trivia they just gloss over in the video - that's Sky Net bitches!  I mean, if my computer at home is smarter than all the Earth's population then what do you think the Army's computers are going to be able to do?!?  And guess what?  Guess what.  They're going to strap guns on them.  And THAT, Fuckers, is SkyNet.  Sure, laugh now; but when your grand kids are being muscled around by an oversized waffle iron with a .50 cal machine gun for a right hand and a flame thrower for a left hand then the fun and games get pissed out the window...  so... yeah.  Stay sucker free.




Wednesday, June 10, 2009

SWEAR JAR

Despite being the best selling beer in America, Bud Light is pretty much trash garbage ca-ca poopie.  In other words, it's ass in a can that's somehow boiled down and given a yellowish tint.  I mean, Beer Advocate rates it a D- for chrissakes; which means "avoid" for them.  And for us too.  Because the people at BA love us and want us to be free from assholes disguised as beer.  All that being said, the people over there at Bud Light sure do make f*cking sweet assed commercials.  Here's my motherf*cking favorite one.  Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present the c*cksucking Swear Jar.  




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Tuesday, June 9, 2009

ORANGE GLOWING SPOOGE

Another fantastic product by Billy Mays: Orange Glo... dubbed over by Jabooodty Dubs.  I don't know who these guys are but they give me a goddam chuckle.  However, I think it's weird that their spooge glows in the dark and that they make enough of it so that it takes a mop to clean it up.  Plus, their pubic hairs are huge!  What's up with that?!?  ... I mean, at least that's what they say in the video... I wouldn't know about it otherwise.  Nope.  Really wouldn't.