I got caught up in a wicked-assed chuckle fit today so bad that I poofed out a fart right in the middle of a service call with Habib the Magic Carpet Man regarding my DVD player. I was watching the stock market plow into the ground like a B- 52 Bomber with it's wings cut off while the news was reporting how AIG Executives will be taking A SECOND luxury getaway (the first one a few weeks ago cost $400,000) with their new bailout cash. The total retardedness of the whole thing tickled the masochistic tip of my funny bone, and I tee-hee'd it for a solid ten minutes. Meanwhile, I can't swing a dead cat without hearing a fucking Sarah Palin story; I'm getting junk mail/catalogues by the truckload begging me to buy cheap plastic kitchen gadgets or clothes made in Indonesia with my devalued dollar; home values are plunging around me so that I can't move; gas prices are heading back up; the guy next door chants "drill, baby, drill" each time there's a debate; and my cat is losing his sphincter tone. Ahhh... America. Fuck yeah.
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