SOME FUN NUMBERS

I try not to get too political on this site, mainly because talking politics is like throwing your feces all over you and the people around you - no one really wins ... and everyone smells like shit afterwards. But I'm gonna dip a toe in the water tonight... or fling a dingleberry... or whatever goddam metaphor smokes your balls. All I've heard about lately is health care, health care reform, socialism, cost, how are we going to pay for it, bureaucracy, blah, blah, blah, pfft. Despite this, however, I haven't really thought much about all this health care foshnoozle. That is, until I saw these numbers (below) ticking off. It's the current cost of the Iraq war. Now, I don't pretend to know what the answer to the health care issue. But I do know, that all that cash being pissed away before your very eyes below sure could pay for a lot of pap smears and prostate exams. Capishe?

Technorati Tags: healthcare, cost, of, war, in, iraq, health reform, pap smear, prostate exam, reform, mother fancies

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QUITE POSSIBLY THE GREATEST THING EVER SAID.

Yeah, that's right.  This guy to the left.  Sure, he was in the Blade movies with Wesley Snipes, which moved his cool factor from a -7 to about a 1 - which still puts him solidly pansy in my book.  But there's a new article in Rolling Stone this month about good old Kris, and a run-in he had with Toby Keith.  

Kris Kristofferson was backstage at Willie Nelson's 70th birthday party several years ago.  While everyone waited in the wings to go on, Toby Keith walks by and says, "Hey Kris, none of that left shit out there tonight."

At that moment in time, Keith had a monster radio hit about bombing America's enemies back into the Stone Age.

Kristofferson said "What did you just say to me?" and stepped to Keith; Willie muttered something about not getting Kris riled up.  Then Kris, an Army vet during the 60's, got in Keith's face and asked, "Have you ever killed another man?  Huh?  Have you ever taken another man's life and then cashed the check your country gave you for doing it?  No, you have not, so shut the fuck up."

Mr. Keith replied, "What?" and Kristofferson said, "Don't 'what' me, boy!  You heard the question.  You just don't like the answer.  I asked, 'Have you ever served your country?'  The answer is, 'No, you have not.'"  And then, right there in front of Ray Charles, Norah Jones, and Willie Nelson, Kristofferson told Toby Keith... "You don't know what the fuck you are talking about!"

Willie, of course, was trying not to laugh.  At the end he said, "Waylon Jennings always used to say, 'Those kind of people did for country music what pantyhose did for finger-fucking.'"

Take a moment to drink in the absolute sublime perfection of that last line.  Who knew Waylon Jennings was such a goddam brilliant orator.

Technorati Tags: willie nelson, waylon jennings, toby keith, rolling stone, kris kristoferson, iraq, iran, withdraw, stimulus, boob rockets

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WE ARE SO F*CKED

A few days ago I posted a video explaining the credit crisis that's currently ass raping us as a country.  Today I'm doing a follow-up on that post with a 30 minute clip from a movie called I.O.U.S.A.  I know: thirty minutes is a long time to watch a video on your computer that doesn't involve cunnilingus or someone accidentally getting bonked in the nuts.  But, even if you don't like economic issues, you should check this out.  I mean, it really took a nice Saturday and turned it into a study in helplessness and despair; leaving me huddled in a corner in the fetal position quivering in a puddle of my own piss while clutching $43 like it was the only thing standing between me and life in a Turkish prison.  Who would say 'no' to that?  Stay strong.

Technorati Tags: i.o.u.s.a., debt, deficit, economic stimulus, broke, bankruptcy, obama, bush, iraq, nibble tips

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TORTURE: THE SOUNDTRACK

I'm not a big fan of torture.  I once had a wicked hang nail that had me confessing shit to my cat that I didn't even do.  But you can only go down the Epsom salt path so many times without relief before you start resorting to "alternative" methods.  Anyway, here are the 9 songs that are blasted on prisoners at Guantanamo Bay, in Afghanistan, and in Iraq (in no particular order) to torture their sandy brown asses'.  There's one thing I don't like about this list: only 9 songs.  It's like having 19 hijackers - you know there's one more.  Terrorists and torturers like even numbers.  So what's the 10th song?!?!   I bet it's some form of Christian rock.  Whatever that last song is, torture rocks.  Stay strong.

Metallica- Enter Sandman.mp3

Drowning Pool - Bodies (Let The Bodies Hit The Floor).mp3




AC/DC - Shoot to Thrill (Live At Donnington) High Quality!!!.mp3




hells bells.mp3




Barney - I Love You.mp3




Born In The U.S.A. - Bruce Springsteen.mp3




David Gray - Babylon.mp3

Eminem - White America.mp3




Sesame Street - 1970's opening (show 2178).mp3



Technorati Tags: babe, beer, tune, humor, finance, torture, songs, guantanamo bay, iraq, iran, afghanistan, pistol packing mother

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