That's the end of the road for this little journey. Time to go put some brother's in check. Stay strong.
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Kind of a mixed bag of topics tonight because I'm in a weird mood. Let's just say my day started with me jerking off in front of a window like a goddam monkey. It was downhill from there. So let's get on with the random-ness.
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If it wasn't for random bullshit and porn I don't think the internet would exist. And that means WTCCTR wouldn't exist either. I know. I know. It's almost impossible to comprehend the utter awfulness of it. Of course, there would be advantages. I'd have way more time to devote to driving around with my Viet Nam buddies solving crimes. Wait... that's the A-Team isn't it? ... Hmmm... I coulda sworn I was the silvery haired ring leader. Anyway, on to the bullshit! Featured tonight is a calculator that figures out your miles per gallon. No, not your car's miles per gallon - YOUR miles per gallon. In other words, if you drank a gallon of water mixed with liquid food, how far could you walk until you dropped dead. At the end you're given your own personal miles per gallon which is then translated into what kind of car you would be. What kind of car was I? Let's just say you couldn't afford me (hint: if you put a monster cock on a Bugatti you'd be close).
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Here are five random pictures which I've deemed both righteous and awesome, for different reasons. But they all have one thing in common: you can use them as wallpaper for your computer. A friendly note of caution... they're awesomeness has a high probability of smoking your ass and making your pickle pucker. Yeah. I'm saying it.
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Ok, so I've been accused of having some kind of a fascination with poo. I think it's time I set the record straight. I really don't like crap, shit, or any other kind of stuff exiting the anal region. Do not want. Ok. Now that we're clear on that I'll contradict myself and say that I think the whole "bathroom humor" thing is hilarious. If someone shits their pants in front of me well, that's my entertainment for the week. So when I ran across tonight's featured site it was like the clouds parted and a little poop-Jesus said, Bring forth the feces my Son. Sprinkle brigade is a group of guys with a lot of free time on their hands trekking around town, decorating dog shit, and taking pictures of it. There. Hours of entertainment on a Sunday night. You're welcome. Stay strong.
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In the not too distant future we'll be lying in our grubby concrete underground bunkers, choking on our own BO from not having had running water for like 700 billion months; and will look back on this period of time and say this was when it all started. It clicked into place for me today when I saw this article in which the US military is developing agile robots to track "uncooperative humans." And if that doesn't make a little ass nugget plop into your frosty white fruit 'o the looms check out the video below, which shows the fucking robots that are going to have the 50-caliber rifles strapped to their backs telling you to comply.
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I think everyone and their mother saw the Sarah Palin interviews with Katie Couric. There was some controversy that CBS edited some of those interviews to cut out the parts embarrassing to Gov. Palin. If they did have this deal, boy did they do a shitty job. BUT, once again, I got your backs' bitches. I found one of the un-edited interview clips. It's just as I suspected too: embarrassing to the Governor. And hilarious. And bone crunching. The un-edited part comes in at about 0:45. Stay strong.
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Schiff-er-riffic! As in Peter Schiff. As in financial. Schiff is Ron Paul's financial guru and they've been screaming for us to watch out for this mess we're now in for years. Schiff even wrote a book entitled, "Crash Proof: How To Profit From The Coming Economic Collapse" back in February 2007. And in the following clip he's forecasting our current shit storm... oh yeah, this interview was done TWO YEARS AGO!
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Today is blog action day, which means everyone who writes a blog is supposed to cover a predetermined topic. The topic for today's BAD is poverty. So here's my two cents on poverty: it sucks ass. Poverty equals no cable tv, crappy food, a shitty car, no cell phone minutes, uncomfortable mattresses, ugly dates, and stale beers. But it's not so bad if you have a giant horn hanging off the front of your crotchal region and have the rugged good looks of a fighter pilot. Seriously, a monster wang makes up for a lot with the ladies. Anyway, back to poverty. As a tribute to poverty I'm posting the next installment of the documentary, Freedom To Fascism - about that filthy whore called the Federal income tax. Stay strong.
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Hey, how do you know when a rock band is awesome? When they fucking rock for 35 fucking years, that's how. Oh, and when one of their founding members is named after a steak and wears little schoolboy outfits. Myself, I've only been rocking the masses with my electric kazoo and monster wang for about 30 years, so I haven't reached "rock legend" status yet. I guess I'll be living off the coke and groupies until then. In the meantime, AC/DC will be sticking a brand new album right up your ass on October 20th - just 6 days!! I mean, christ-a-gogo... there hasn't been a decent rock and roll album since they released their last album in 2000. So here's the first single off the new album entitled "Rock 'n Roll Train." Stay strong.
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You know that old expression, "If you want something done right, do it yourself?" Well, I'm thinking that goes for politics just as much as it goes for wagging Elvis. So here's a nifty little program to get your campaign started. I've already thrown my hat into the ring and am running on a platform of unfettered public masturbation and a shorter work week - in that order. May the best man win bitches. Game on.
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